OH: I've never had a girlfriend during Build before. Editorial note: We've been together a year and a half.

Okay, overcrowded O'Hare food court. You leave me no other choice but to sit next to the young Italians with Nazi haircuts.

Accidentally dipped the knife I just used to slice brie into a jar of marshmallow creme that went straight into my mouth

Florida is only interesting two or three times a decade

I am having a great time. http://t.co/OnI8Tkff

My audiobook files were out of order so I ended up reading Hemingway's The Sea and the Old Man

To do: Ship hundreds of incredibly hygroscopic, fragile lollipops a fifth of the way around the world from one rainy climate to another

Luckily my mom's basement was not flooded; unfortunately this provides no motivation for my 24 year old brother to finally move out of it.

The one night a year when I can listen to The Misfits and not get made fun of.

Knowing me, you'd think I'd be ecstatic to live in a world where I have no way of being contacted by my mom or my brother